Wow ... I almost depressed myself typing the "tags", but though still smiling, I guess I'm just cycling around through an "angry phase."  I'm told this is good for me, but ... it is uncomfortable as all get out.  I don't like being angry, but please pardon me while I rant ... 

For nearly 20 years, I was married to a sex addict.  More about that in Life After Sex Addiction, but the bottom line is ... I'm free now.  I am not as clever and clinical as my dear friend bobcat818 whose words bring healing as he himself heals.  Neither can I keep it all bottled inside or put a smiley face on it.  It was an ugly and painful sequence of years & events.  I like to think they enabled me to become acquainted with compassion, too.

How am I angry, you might ask ...  how indeed? (Please pardon me while a rant)  I seethe inside every time any of my kids choose to spend time with their dad.  It makes me crazy that, by appearances, he didn't lose a step in his life, but quickly re-married a woman whose name is even Barbara, too, and she supports him, mothers him, and looks the other way when his addiction glares at me, and even a local church (void of any spiritual discernment) has embraced him and put him in a leadership position ... OY!

How am I angry?  Twenty years ... a lifetime devoted to a family that was to him, an illusion.  Forgiveness is a choice that I have made ... harder to walk out.  I can only shake my head, dry my tears and go on ... get my MA and see what lies around the next turn in the road.